Funny sarcastic quotes for you “Not everyone gets the same version of me. One person might tell you I’m an amazing beautiful soul. Another person will say I’m a cold-hearted asshole – believe them both, I act accordingly.
Are you looking for the best sarcastic quotes? If you want to know why sarcasm has now become a meaningful way to express one’s feelings, Look no further! Here are 38 funny sarcasm quotes and sayings to make you laugh. Best Sarcastic Quotes And Funny Sarcasm Sayings “My level of sarcasm has gotten to the point where I don’t even know if I’m kidding or not.
#1. Keep your head high, and your middle finger higher.”
#2. People will notice the change in your attitude towards them, but won’t notice their behavior that made you change.”
#3. Bixch, I wanna slap you, but I don’t know in which face.”
#4. To the people who lose one shoe on the side of the highway: Please tell me what the rest of your life is like.”
#5. One of the hardest decisions you’ll ever face in life is choosing whether to walk away or try harder.”
#6. Apology accepted, trust denied.”
#7. #I know everything happens for a reason. But sometimes I wish I knew what that reason was.”
#8. I’m technically single but my heart is taken by someone I can’t call my own.”
#9. Bixch, please move away from the sunlight, I hate the smell of burning plastic.”
#10. I don’t understand your specific kind of crazy but I do admire your total commitment to it.”
#11. Cheating is the most disgusting, hurtful, & disrespectful thing you could do to someone you say you love.”
#12. No regrets in life. Just lessons learned.”
#13. No response is a response. And it’s a powerful one. Remember that.”
Funny Sarcastic Quotes
#14. One morning she woke up different. Done with trying to figure out who was with her, against her, or walking down the middle because they didn’t have the guts to pick a side. She was done with anything that didn’t bring her peace. She realized that opinions were a dime a dozen, validation was for parking, and loyalty wasn’t a word but a lifestyle.it was this day that her life changed. And not because of a man or a job but because she realized that life is way too short to leave the key to your happiness in someone else’s pocket.”
#15. I hope karma slaps you in the face before I do.”
#16. I’m allergic to stupidity. I break out in sarcasm.”
#17. #When people treat you like they don’t care, believe them.”
#18. Sometimes I have to tell myself it’s just not worth the jail time.”
#19. This is what you don’t do. Don’t let this world make you bitter. Don’t let the actions of other people turn you cold on the inside. Certain things happen that hurt us, people come that leave us, and most of all there are moments when you’re bound to fall. Don’t let those things make you unkind. It’s okay to cry. It’s okay to be sad. But it’a never okay to do other people wrong just because you were done wrong. We’re human. We break. We make mistakes. But don’t let pain and sadness run your lives. Wake up in the morning and do what you think is right. There are moments in your life where you feel like giving up and you can’t take it anymore. It’s okay. Breathe. Inhale. Exhale. I know you’re weak. But the things that show your weak side are also the same ones that make you stronger in the long run. It’s all about taking whatever life throws at you and learning from it.”
#20. Sorry is not enough. Sometimes you actually have to change.”
#21. There comes a point in your life when you realize who matters, who never did, who won’t anymore, and who always will. And in the end, you learn who is fake, who is true and who would risk it all for you.”
#22. Apologies don’t mean anything if you keep doing what you’re sorry for.”
#23. I will remember and recover, not forgive and forget.”
#24. Congratulations! You’ve managed to make me feel like a worthless piece of shit again. Would you like an award for that!.”
#25. You are either on my side, by my side, or in my fucking way choose wisely.”
#26. You don’t just stop loving someone. You either always will, or you never did in the first place.”
#27. There is a difference between giving up and knowing when you have had enough.”
#28. The deepest of a woman’s insecurities often come from the men who have hurt them.”
#29. Don’t ever mistake my silence for ignorance, my calmness for acceptance and my kindness for weakness.”
#30. We are all a little broken. But the last time I checked, broken crayons still color the same.”
#31. If you show me you don’t give a fuck, I’ll show you that I’m better at it.”
#32. Somedays I really believe that my horoscope is going to say: #Just don’t fucking kill anyone today”.”
#33. You can spend minutes, hours, days, weeks, or even months over-analyzing a situation, trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could’ve, would’ve happened; or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move the fuck on.”
#34. One of the hardest lessons in life is letting go. Whether it’s guilt, anger, love, loss or betrayal. Change is never easy. We fight to hold on and we fight to let go.”
#35. Sometimes it’s not the people who change, it’s the mask that falls off.”
#36. If you ran like your mouth, you’d be in good shape.”
#37. Life has taught me that you can’t control someone’s loyalty. No matter how good you are to them, doesn’t mean they’ll treat you the same. No matter how much they mean to you, doesn’t mean they’ll value you the same. Sometimes the people you love the most, turn out to be the people you can trust the least.”
#38. When something goes wrong in your life, just yell, #plot twist!” and move on.”
“If money’s the god people worship, I’d rather go worship the devil instead.” ― Jess C Scott,
“Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.” ― Ashleigh Brilliant
“Writers don’t get mad they get even in their novels.” ― Candace Bowen Early
“If this constant bitter disappointment was love, then I was perfectly fine not to have anything to do with it.” ― Vann Chow,
“(The Mona Lisa), that really is the ugliest portrait I’ve seen, the only thing that supposedly makes it famous is the mystery behind it,” Katherine admitted as she remembered her trips to the Louvre and how she shook her head at the poor tourists crowding around to see a jaundiced, eyebrow-less lady that reminded her of tight-lipped Washington on the dollar bill. Surely, they could have chosen a better portrait of the First President for their currency?” ― E.A. Bucchianeri,
“I’d venture to guess that a list of things you know nothing about could fill volumes.” ― Heidi Schulz
“It was a master surgeon, him that ampytated me – out of college and all – Latin by the bucket, and what not; but he was hanged like a dog, and sun-dried like the rest, at Corso Castle.” ― Robert Louis Stevenson,
“The jusitce is blind. Turn the surveillance cameras off!” ― Ljupka Cvetanova,
“Compassion: listening to a month’s worth of snivelling when you break up with yet another asshole.” ― Martyn V. Halm
“i’m no good-girl-gone bad or goin O-na-na like Rihanna, but I’m gonna Work It like Iggy and Ride Like Lana.” ― Bee
“I have a new found respect for Atlas.” ― Solange nicole
“Good to know: Doctors can’t cure you of being a beast.” ― Alex Flinn
“If all it takes to motivate you is a quote then this quote has nothing to say – except to go soar with the freakin’ eagles.” ― Ryan Lilly
“The problem is that in this jail there are too many mosquitoes, they don’t let me sleep.” ― Prashant Yadav,
“If you don’t understand it, it’s art.” ― Ljupka Cvetanova,
“I don’t need a hero. I was blessed with a large amount of common sense, which is of infinitely more use than a man.” ― Karen Hawkins,
“The rivers fight with each other with the only currency that they know: water. We humans fight with the only currency that we know in this age: violence.” ― Amish Tripathi,
“Being Kind, Is Not My Kind” ― Syed Sharukh
“Unalloyed Joy of Life has become a trademark; starting from the day, when the world economy has come to a standstill.” ― sir kristian goldmund aumann
