100 Funny Quotes And Sayings Short funny Words

(Last Updated On: March 14, 2019)

#11. When you walking downstairs and accidentally step two steps down”

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#12. Why can’t the house clean itself? It seems to get dirty by itself!”

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#13. Husband & his wife went for divorce at court. Judge: U have 3 kids… How will u divide them? They had a long discussion with his wife & said #Ok, sir we will come next year with 1 more” joke doesn’t end here 9 months later…. They got twins”

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#14. The thing about smart motherfuckers is they sound like crazy motherfuckers to dumb motherfuckers”

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#15. When someone asks if they can fax me something. Fax? Why don’t you just send it over on a dinosaur?”

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#16. 50 dirty jokes that are never appropriate(But always funny) want to hear a dirty joke? Ok!”

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#17. I recently applied for a part-time job at a mental hospital. Now I’m there full time and they won’t let me leave.”

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#18. The 10 dad jokes you need to read 1. I’ve heard that Prague is really cool. We should Czech it out. 2. I have a fear of speed bumps but I’m slowly getting over it. 3. Where do you learn how to make ice cream? Sunday school 4. Two guys walk into a bar the third one ducks. 5. Want to know Forrest Gump’s password? 1forrest1. 6. Did you hear about that new broom? It’s sweeping the nation. 7. People are making too many apocalypse jokes. It’s like there’s no tomorrow. 8. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasse. 9. What did the buffalo say to his son when he went off to college? Bison. 10 when does a dad joke become a dad joke? When it becomes apparent.”

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#19. So you know the gold bond commercial, with Shaq and the sexy ladies? Here is a picture of legendary big man Dwayne #the rock” Johnson, with your average girl here he is looking like a small child next to Shaq which leads me to ask. How big are those women?”

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#20. A little girl asked her mother, #How did the human race begin?” The mother answered #God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and so all mankind was made.” The next day, the little girl asked her dad the same question, #How did the human race begin?”The father answered, #Many years ago, there were monkeys from which the human race evolved.” The confused girl returned to her mother and said #Mom, how is it”

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